How Could I Kill a Tiger Armed Only With a Biro?

2007-04-15T10:22:00.000-04:00

http://free-game-downloads.mosw.com/

Campaign Commercial Invasion

2006-11-01T15:55:00.000-05:00

Lately, commercials have been getting under my skin. Granted, everything gets under my skin. But at least these are reasonable complaints. Political campaign commercials have been ridiculous. Not only are these 30 second spots on at EVERY commercial break, but they are almost entirely negative. Good ol' Teddy Roosevelt characterized this reprehensible tactic, "raking the muck", a century ago and it has only gotten worse since.

Listen Michael Arcuri, candidate for NY's 24th Congressional District. I don't care if your opponent in this election, Ray Meier, voted to increase his own pay 45,000 times last week. And Dan Maffei, candidate for NY's 25 Congressional District, I don't want to hear that incumbent Jim Walsh has voted 99% of the time in concurrence with George W. Bush. Please don't use buzz words to win the election. Politics isn't about parties, it's about the people. What kind of solutions can you offer to bipartisan issues? Great, so you think Iraq was a terrible initiative. Is that really a novel perspective these days? What do you think about Social Security? What do you think about Medicare? What is your plan for taxes? What is your plan for the federal deficit? How are you going to improve the country's education? Don't give me overplayed, distorted perspectives that may be valid, but are out of context and diverting from the real issues. Give me answers. And when one candidate's opponent wins, they will wish the winner good luck and tell their constituents to trust their representative. I'm tired of the two-facedness that characterizes American politics. Politics really is a fruitless career for intelligent, aspiring young people, causing the best persons for the job to work in the private sector or for themselves.

There is one candidate in this region who I have not seen making negative political ads. Not that I can even vote for him (being from NJ), but Dave Valesky, incumbent running for the seat of State Senator in NY for Oneida County, would receive my vote. I know nothing of his political actions besides what he says in his ads, and didn't even know what political party he is a member of until I looked for him online.

Only in researching his political stances can I see that in many ways I don't agree with his political views at all, but in comparison to politicians of my lifetime, I at least feel as though I can trust him to be honest and forthright. That's why there is widespread disenchantment among young voters. Being new to the political process, we concern ourselves with the issues, rather than the parties, or the parties' histories. That's why politicians who we come to trust to be honest with us garner our respect. People like Senator John McCain. But while honesty and a best effort is subservient to partisan politics and pandering agendas to special interests, politicians like McCain will never gain his party's Presidential nomination.

Obviously all of these muck raker campaigners believe that Americans are too dumb/lazy to research political stances, and I don't necessarily disagree. But based on this same mentality, if I was to go into the voting booth knowing nothing about the candidates' politics, I would cast my vote for the candidate with integrity. For me, addressing the issues will always work better than smear tactics.

And I am aware that negative campaigning works. But the people who we elect to represent us in government, the people who should strive only for the betterment of their region and the nation as a whole, need to hold themselves to a higher standard. I don't care that muck raking works. If anyone should be counted on to always demonstrate integrity, honesty, respect for others; characteristics of a true leader, it should be politicians.

Water for My Soul When it Gets Thirsty

2006-10-31T21:32:00.000-05:00

In looking back at my submissions, I realize that I haven't posted once about music. I consider music to be the most satisfying and personal of any form of art and entertainment. Unfortunately, I am just about the only one without musical talent in my immediate and extended family.

Regardless, I am emphatic to the point of pretentiousness about music I like, as are most people. I think that I have a relatively wide range of musical genres that I listen to, but there are certainly a lot of genres that I don't often include in playlists. I enjoy alternative, rock, classical, instrumental, hip hop, and combinations of some of the aforementioned (alternrock, etc.). Excluded from that list is jazz, country, emo, for some. While my feelings do not go so far as to dislike each one of those, I just don't have enough interest to listen to them consistently.

What I really appreciate in music is that it stimulates the imagination. When music can be tied to memory is when it really establishes its value. That is also how it becomes personal. And when music can be beautifully interlaced with the flowing narrative of a music video or movie scene, the visual and aural moments are indelibly etched into memory together. For example in my own case, when I was in Australia I heard the song "Don't Phunk With My Heart" by the Black Eyed Peas for the first time. Normally, this is not a song that I would have much interest in. But since hearing it causes me to associate it with the sights, accents, and experiences that I had in Australia, it is a mental trigger for me to reminisce. In a similar vein, many people that had "the song" with an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend in the past, which they now can not stand to listen to.

Music is innately tied to memory, even more so than any other art form. That's why I think that it is important to either pursue an interest in learning to play music or at least establishing your own palate for what you like and dislike, and why. There really is no more valuable and powerful an art form in existence. Music is the essence of culture, a priceless commodity, and we are all blessed with what it gives to each one of us on a personal, intimate basis.

Watching TV Shows on DVD is Addictive Behavior

2006-10-30T18:59:00.000-05:00

I have done a lot of coverage on movies in this blog. But I would like to dedicate at least one post to television. Specifically, I would like to offer a world of praise to the wonderful entertainment medium that is television shows on DVD. And I would like to offer equally harsh criticism of video stores in their renting schemes for television shows on DVD.

First, television shows on DVD are much more watchable than movies on DVD. When it comes to half-hour programming, these episodes play in little over 20 minutes after commercials are removed. Also, hour-long programming comes out to about 44 minutes on DVD. Obviously, the cumulative material of all of the episodes of a TV show will exceed that of a one and a half to three hour movie. But TV shows are meant to be broken up into pieces, so you can watch just one twenty minute episode and move on. Have you ever tried stopping in the middle of a movie, and not gotten around to finish it until the next day or later? It doesn't flow as well as TV shows do in this way. And the great part is that you can get your fill of material beyond the (approximated) 2 hours of a movie.

But the worst aspect of TV shows on DVD is how they are presented. They are almost always significantly more expensive to buy than a single movie is. TV shows on DVD usually range from about $25-$50, while movies on DVD usually cost $15-$20. When you're poor like me, this is a significant cost gap. But what is even worse is the way that rental services like Blockbuster handle TV shows on DVD. Instead of having them in the normal renting format, where you could rent an entire season, they only allow you to rent a single DVD at a time for TV shows, regardless of the fact that most seasons are packaged as a series of a few DVDs. So if I want to rent "Pee-Wee's Playhouse" on DVD, I can only rent Disc 1 from Season 1, rather than all of Season 1. The first problem with this is the cost. Renting one disc at a time rather than the whole season is obviously more expensive. Second is the inconvenience. If you have to keep going back to the video store to get new discs, it is certainly discouraging you from renting. And since they break up the season into discs, it is common that the next disc in the series that you go to rent at the video store will be rented out by another customer.

But fear not! I have a solution for you. Thanks to the wonderful student newspaper of Syracuse University, "The Daily Orange", I was introduced to the website www.allfg.org, which links to all different TV shows hosted on other websites. It is really quite useful, and will save you plenty of money in DVD rentals or buys.

So make sure to look into TV shows on DVD (if you haven't already). There are plenty others that I could cite, but here are some lesser-known favorites of mine. Check out: Arrested Development, The Office (UK... more like a miniseries), The Office (US) is good too (even though the first season is abominable), Band of Brothers (miniseries), and Weeds. Enjoy!

Childhood Memories

2006-10-29T15:24:00.000-05:00

I would be remisce if I went through my entire blog without ever posting a random, non-sequential series of my childhood memories. Being born in 1986, my teen years were only recently completed. I consider this to be the closing of my youth and the beginning of my adulthood, which is utterly depressing. These are everyone's most formative, developmental years and it was truly sad to see them go.

So here goes. Some memories (for boys and girls) from early childhood that I think are universal among people my age are: Mr. Rogers, Sesame Street, Disney movies (notably the Lion King, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, The Little Mermaid) from this era, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Hot Wheels cars, GI Joe, Silly Putty, Nickelodeon Guts, Wild and Crazy Kids, Legend of the Hidden Temple, Gak, Super Soakers, Super Mario Kart, Zelda, The Price is Right (on sick days), Beanie Babies, My Little Pony, Play-Doh, Polly Pocket, Barbies, American Girl Dolls, Lite Brite, Easy Bake Ovens, Glo Worms, Playmobil, Creepy Crawlers, Hess Trucks, TGIF, Family Matters, Full House, and much more. In fact, if you can name some other suggestions in the comments region, please do.

Most of these memories are from about 10 years or younger (for me at least). I think that life before the awkward years of middle school (see: my middle school yearbook photo) were the best times of all. Sure, maturity is fun and all, but responsibility is certainly worse than the complete lack of it that we had in our youngest years. I remember some great personal memories from back in the day that I really cherish (partly because I have a terrible memory and have no other choice).

So thank you Emily Donelan and Melissa Larsen, for daring me to go into the women's bathroom in 4th grade. I walked 3 steps in, and I won, so you were both pwned.

I CALLED IT!!!!!

2006-10-28T15:39:00.000-04:00

That's right ladies and gentlemen. The St. Louis Cardinals are the World Series champions. And I know what you're thinking. "How did Brian Doty successfully pick the Cards to win despite all supposed logic suggesting otherwise?". Well I was rooting for the Tigers, so I utilized a little something I like to call "The Doty Rule".

The Rule is as simple as this: if I pick, or am rooting for one team to win, at least 2/3 of the time, the opposition will win. This is without a doubt the work of a deity (in whatever form) attempting to shame and torture me. I am in no way suggesting that I am important enough for a deity to make the effort to shame me. All I am saying is that any deity would jump at the chance to humiliate someone so self-righteous, and yet, resigned to failure, as me. So yes, I am important enough.

Have you ever heard a player from the winning team say, "I want to thank (deity) for this victory" or "(Deity) was watching over me today"? They have absolute certainty that (deity) was so dedicated to their cause that he forced an opposing linebacker into the field goal uprights, rupturing his spleen and leaving his 4 children without a father. Hey, it worked for Sodom and Gomorrah.

All I am meaning to say is that I have the same mentality as these players. If (deity) is willing to determine the outcome of a water polo match for the players, then he/she is certainly willing to go out of his/her way to make sure I end up in last place for my fantasy football league. Curse you Ahman Green.

So remember, next time you want to bet on a sports outcome (even though betting online in the US is all but over), give me a call and see who I am rooting for. Extra certainty depends on how emphatic I am in my selections. And don't forget: I will always seek your pity.

Resurrecting Trigger Happy TV

2006-10-26T00:14:00.000-04:00

This post will be aimed at restoring to the public conscience the greatest hidden-camera-variety-show-to-come-out-of-England-this-century. But in all actuality, it is one of the funniest shows, a show that never quite got enough recognition in the USA. Dom Joly and the other members of the show had wildly creative ideas, always catching regular, unsuspecting people and putting them in situations that would be great stories for these people to tell at parties.

They had many recurring characters, such as the burglar who needs help from the man/woman on the street; the spy, mistaking a regular person as the contact they were meant to meet; the street performer, who was terrible at their craft and always demanded a tip; and numerous skits that involved dressing up in animal costumes. One of my favorite bits involved Dom standing on a sidewalk under a gigantic billboard that said "DO NOT TRUST THIS MAN" with his picture next to it. He would stop passerbys and ask for their help, and either most people would not see the billboard, or would not make the connection. To see a different one of my favorite bits, click here. Another great bit was when Dom would be all around different places and his cell phone would ring, prompting him to pick up a giant cell phone-shaped object and pretend to have a conversation through it while yelling at the top of his lungs. This recurring bit actually became the face and calling card (pun alert!) of the show, which many casual viewers remember most from it. Here is a compilation of that gag:

I was a big fan of this show during its run on Comedy Central about 3 or 4 years ago. The skits on the show align closely with British dry, dark humor, which probably put off a lot of American viewers (especially when their skits involved the elderly). But for those of us with immature senses of humor, it was golden. But American viewers who did not get their total fix of these gags have another venue! Dom Joly began a new show a few years later on the BBC called "World Shut Your Mouth". It is a lot of the same sort of ideas, but it seems like they have a lot more funding for this series. Here is a sample clip:

Anyway, if you're interested, check it out! I hope you enjoyed the videos, and if you're looking for more, go to YouTube and type in "Trigger Happy TV" as a search. And just for kicks, here are some more clips from "Trigger Happy TV" and "World Shut Your Mouth"!

"Trigger Happy TV"

"World Shut Your Mouth"

"In a World Where Both of Our Cars Were Totally Underwater"

2006-10-22T23:07:00.000-04:00

Now that fall is here, the summer blockbusters have gone away (see: "Superman Returns" and "Pirates of the Carribbean: Dead Man's Chest"), so in come the Oscar contenders. There is a lot of speculation regarding who will be up for what and who will win what. I won't get into predictions yet since many of these movies have yet to be released. I also won't get into why I think that the Academy Awards have no credibility, and how the Golden Globes should take over as the real benchmark for achievement. But I will give you a brief synopsis of some movies that I think could change the sentiments of my earlier post. So here goes (in order of release date):

*The reasons I have chosen to post links to trailers instead of embed videos in the blog so you can watch it here is because 1)The video quality on YouTube is poor; and 2)It would significantly slow the load time of the blog.*

The Illusionist - released Sept. 1st - Edward Norton, Jessica Biel, Paul Giamatti - A magician in turn of the century Vienna falls in love with a woman well above his social standing. When she becomes engaged to a prince, the magician uses his powers to win her back and undermine the stability of the royal house of Vienna. - Trailer - This movie sounds strange, but has gotten very good reviews and Edward Norton has a talent for distinguishing good roles and movies.
The Science of Sleep - released Sept. 22nd (limited) - Gael Garcia Bernal, Charlotte Gainsbourg - A young man returns home under the new employment of a great job. Wildly creative, his vivid dream life begins to bleed into his waking life. In the meantime, he meets his neighbor and develops feelings for her. But despite the great things happening to him, he begins to develop insecurities that threaten impending dilemmas. - Trailer - This movie has a limited release, so its appeal probably exists as a rental. This movie was written and directed by Michel Gondry, director of Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and numerous popular music videos. A movie that appeals mostly to niche interests, but has value in its originality that anyone could appreciate.
The Last King of Scotland - released Sept. 27th (limited) - Forest Whitaker, James McAvoy - A documentary-style film based on the events of the brutal Ugandian dictator Idi Amin's regime as seen by his personal physician during the 1970s. - Trailer - Lots of Oscar buzz for Forest Whitaker in this one, but it is a period piece and a documentary, which turns off some people.
The Departed - released Oct.6th - Leonardo DiCaprio, Matt Damon, Vera Farmiga, Jack Nicholson, Martin Sheen, Mark Wahlberg, Alec Baldwin - Two men from opposite sides of the law are undercover within the Massachusetts State Police Department and the Irish Mafia. But violence and bloodshed boil when discoveries are made and both rat and mole struggle to find out their enemy's identity. - Trailer - This movie has been widely publicized. It is directed by Martin Scorsese, and obviously loaded with stars. Based on the popular Hong Kong film(s) Infernal Affairs.
The Prestige - released Oct. 20th - Hugh Jackman, Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Scarlett Johansson, Piper Perabo - Two magicians develop an intense rivalry and a life-long battle for supremacy fueled by obsession, deceit, and jealousy, which has deadly consequences. - Trailer - Two established leading men and successful director Christopher Nolan (Memento, Batman Begins) combine for the second movie about magicians on this list. With the people involved in this film, it is hard to believe that it could be a dud.
Little Children - set to release Nov. 3rd - Kate Winslet, Patrick Wilson, Jennifer Connelly - In suburbia, a group of young married couples interact throughout their small community in secretive ways that forbode dangerous confrontations. - Trailer - This film has adult themes centering around unfaithful married couples in suburbia, but that doesn't mean that it can only be appreciated by the over 30 crowd.
Babel - set to release Nov. 10th - Brad Pitt, Cate Blanchett, Gael Garcia Bernal, Koji Yakusho - Three stories set in Morocco, Japan, and Mexico intertwine to form a flowing, powerful narrative that draws parallels across borders. - Trailer - This movie seems to be the one that is politically-tangible of the group. Hopefully it won't be another Syriana.
The Fountain - set to release Nov. 22nd - Hugh Jackman, Rachel Weisz - Spanning over one thousand years and three parallel stories, The Fountain is a story of love, death, spirituality, and the fragility of our existence in this world. - Trailer - This is the first Sci-Fi movie of the list, and from the writer/director of Pi and Requiem for a Dream, Darren Aronofsky, it is sure to be... different.
The Holiday - set to release Dec. 8th - Kate Winslet, Cameron Diaz, Jude Law, Jack Black - Two women troubled with guy problems swap homes in each other's countries, where they each meet a local guy and fall in love. - Trailer - This is my selection for any women who are looking for a romantic comedy for the holiday season. I'm not ashamed to include this in the list, before you try to make me feel that way. Also because any of you guys with girlfriends will probably end up being dragged to this anyway.
The Pursuit of Happyness - set to release Dec. 15th - Will Smith, Dan Castellaneta, Thandie Newton, Jaden Smith - A struggling salesman takes custody of his son as he begins a life-changing professional endeavor. - Trailer - This movie would qualify as the inspirational film of this list. Coincidentally, it is based on a true story. Good chance that it will be *the* movie that brings in audiences this Christmas.
Blood Diamond - set to release Dec. 15th - Leonardo DiCaprio, Jennifer Connelly, Djimon Hounsou - A South African mercenary, American journalist, and Mende fisherman are thrown together in a quest to recover a rare pink diamond buried by Solomon (the Mende man). - Trailer - This trailer actually made me laugh at Leo's Afrikaan accent when I first saw it before The Departed (his accent didn't turn out to be stellar in that either). However, that doesn't take away the fact that he is a great actor, and so is Jennifer Connelly. But it seems as though Djimon Hounsou (Gladiator) will steal the show in this movie. I really think the Afrikaan accent is one of the most interesting and powerful accents on the planet, and Djimon (known as "Digimon, Digital Monsters" on the street) gives a perfect example of that in this film.
The Good Shepherd - set to release Dec. 22nd - Matt Damon, Robert De Niro, Angelina Jolie, Joe Pesci, Alec Baldwin - The tumultuous early history of the Central Intelligence Agency as seen through the eyes of a dedicated man's life. - Trailer - This film's lead role was originally offered to Leonardo DiCaprio, who turned it down in order to focus on The Departed. The role then went to DiCaprio's Departed co-star, Matt Damon. Directed by Robert De Niro.
Children of Men - set to release Dec. 29th - Clive Owen, Julianne Moore, Michael Caine - In 2027, in a chaotic world in which humans can no longer procreate, a former activist agrees to help transport a miraculously pregnant woman to a sanctuary at sea, where her child's birth may help scientists save the future of humankind. - Trailer - It is understandable if you feel a bit skeptical about this film. I certainly feel the same. However, it has garnered very positive reviews from critics and viewers alike.
The Painted Veil - set to release Jan. 19th, 2007 - Naomi Watts, Edward Norton, Liev Schreiber - A story set in the 1920s where two young English lovers marry for the wrong reasons and relocate to Shanghai, where she falls in love with someone else. When he discovers this, he accepts a job in a remote village in China ravaged by a deadly cholera epidemic. - Trailer - Ok, so this movie doesn't technically become a wide release film until 2007, but it starts its limited release run on the 29th of December. Also, I am personally very excited for this movie, as it has two of my favorite actors, some beautiful cinematography, and a great trailer.

You may notice some actors common to more than one movie on this list. From my counting, I believe that Edward Norton, Gael Garcia Bernal, Leonardo DiCaprio, Matt Damon, Alec Baldwin, Hugh Jackman, Michael Caine, Kate Winslet, and Jennifer Connelly are each in two movies on the list. Many of these actors I am a particular fan of, which certainly has honed my searches. The others I find to be good actors but do not follow their movies particularly.

Needless to say, this sort of list requires some user interaction. I hope that you have found a few movies that you are interested in from this. What was your favorite trailer? If you have found some you like, please post a comment with which in particular you have picked out. Also, if you feel like there is a movie you think I should include in this, please post a comment. You can do so without being registered with Blogger, and can even post anonymously if you like. And if you have any questions for me, leave a comment. Any way you do so, please, interact!

"AIG: The Strength To Be There"

2006-10-21T15:16:00.000-04:00

If you were watching the Mets-Cardinals Game 7 of the NLCS on thursday, you understand the title. In a tense 1-1 game's 6th inning, Mets left fielder Endy Chavez lept for a ball off the bat of Scott Rolen, snatching it from over the wall to rob Rolen of a home run.

It was a great play... but ultimately it amounted to nothing. The vaunted Mets offense could do nothing against Jeff Suppan (for the second time) and Randy Flowers. Even in the ninth against a young pitcher so geared up that he showed flashes of Rick Ankiel (appropriately in Cardinal red), the Mets couldn't plate any runners after two leadoff singles and an eventual bases-loaded 1 out situation.

So what did the Mets in this year? What did the Yankees in? Why has almost every series gone against prediction? Let's recap: Minnesota picked over Oakland in ALDS, loses; NY Yankees (unanimously on ESPN) picked over Detroit, lose; San Diego picked over St. Louis, loses; NY Mets picked over Dodgers, win; Oakland push with Detroit, Detroit wins; Mets picked over St. Louis, lose. Basically, besides the evenly-picked Detroit-Oakland ALCS, the only series that followed predictions was the Mets over the Dodgers in the first round. What I see here is not so much a surprise, if you look at it within the scope of the regular season. The "experts" designated to pick the correct winners evidently weren't paying too much attention during the regular season. The parity in the MLB was incredible this year. No team won more than 97 games, and only two teams lost 100 or more games, Kansas City (62-100) and Tampa Bay (61-101). It's baffling that 19 people hired as "experts" on baseball could UNANIMOUSLY pick a 97 win team to beat a 95 win team.

But most importantly, this postseason (as every postseason does) presents us with a new team to rally behind. After Detroit beat the Yankees, they suddenly became the team of the minute. Right now, 78% of users on ESPN.com believe that Detroit will handle St. Louis in the World Series. On paper, it might seem that way. I think the only aspect of the game that St. Louis has in its favor right now is the talents of Cards manager Tony La Russa over Tigers manager Jim Leyland (and that is a slight advantage). But the fact that Detroit is the clear favorite to win should be warning sign enough for this postseason... go ahead and put your money on Cardinal red.

Why moviegoers, why?

2006-10-16T21:30:00.000-04:00

Why did "The Grudge 2" make $22 million this weekend, tops at the box office? It beat out "The Departed" at $18.7 million and "Man of the Year" (god awful idea) at $12.5 million. Also, two weekends ago, "Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning" was the film movie patrons most wanted to see. Honestly, you don't respect yourself if you showed up for either of those two films. When the user rating for "The Grudge 2" and "TCM: TB" are 4.8 and 5.8 out of 10 on IMDb, respectively, you know they were terrible. Because the people who are giving this rating are the people who actually shelled out $9 to see it. I love the thought of these morons running up to the ticket window, all giddy and excited, sweaty hair matted to their forehead, because they just can't wait to see Sarah Michelle Gellar getting chased by a little 5 year old who got into his mother's makeup bag. The feeling of absolute superiority that I feel over these idiots is empowering.

This brings me to my next topic. Is 2006 the worst year for movies and music ever (excluding the 80s)? Be honest to yourself, every time you sing the words "You've got a sexy back... YEAHP!", you can feel your dignity slapping you across the face. And you know what the 10 highest grossing movies this year are so far? Here's a list:

Pirates of the Carribbean: Dead Man's Chest - $421 million
Cars - $244 million
X-Men: The Last Stand - $234 million
The Da Vinci Code - $218 million
Superman Returns - $200 million
Ice Age: The Meltdown - $195 million
Over the Hedge - $155 million
Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby - $148 million
Click - $137 million
Mission: Impossible III - $134 million

The first thing you should notice is that if you have a comprehension level equivalent to a 9 year old, virtually nothing on that list is appealing to you. Tell me, where is a great movie on that list? The best that any can manage is "good", and thats only one or two. Regardless, they all probably got "Two thumbs up!" from those sellouts Ebert and Roeper. If you're watching movie previews in 2006 waiting for a "Two thumbs up!" rating from these out-of-touch idiots, then you were probably at "The Grudge 2" in full costume.

It's appalling. The movie industry, music industry, and customers who make them rich have to be doing this just to piss me off. There's no other explanation for it. You know who was invited to my school this fall to play a concert? The All-American Rejects. I'm serious. The All-American Rejects. And the show sold out. To college kids! I thought we were supposed to be the smart ones who dictate popular culture! Am I the only one who appreciates entertainment that is creative and, well, entertaining?

Also, a few weeks ago I went to Blockbuster to rent "Kindergarten Cop", a Governator classic film, filled with hundreds of useful soundboard audio clips. They had no copies in stock. But thankfully, they had a section devoted to Tyler Perry, called "The Tyler Perry Collection". That's a good trade off. Arnold Schwarzenneger, the most unintentionally funny man on the planet (along with Chuck Norris), replaced by a guy ripping off Eddie Murphy's "Nutty Professor" idea. If you don't know, Tyler Perry is incredibly creative! He dresses up as all different characters in his straight-to-video movies and uses zany voices for all of them! You can't make this stuff up! Unless you're Tyler Perry, of course. And I had nothing against the guy until this event. Just the fact that he had a whole collection of straight-to-video movies at Blockbuster instead of the classic "Kindergarten Cop" was enough to make me hate him. I think I even saw "White Chicks" on the shelf. What's the Netflix website again?

Lastly, I want to give a tribute to the artists who have released worthwhile material for the world to enjoy in 2006. "Little Miss Sunshine", even though you only started on 7 screens (compared to the 4,065 of "Superman Returns"), you renewed my faith in movies. I also heard great things about "Thank You for Smoking", so check that out on DVD. And finally, I would like to take this chance to confess how happy I am that M. NIGHT SHYAMALAMADINGDONG's "Lady in the Water" tanked. I guess moviegoers aren't so bad after all...

Introduction

2006-10-15T19:58:00.000-04:00

Welcome sir or ma'am! This blog will fulfill my requirement for my IST 195 class, as well as provide me with an outlet to make outrageous claims that have no factual backing. In order to have the best time possible while reading this blog, I recommend you tune your TV to Home and Garden TV, pop in that new Avril Lavigne CD, start "Phat Girlz" on DVD; anything that will be considered more worthwhile than wasting your time here. Alright, enough with the introduction, on with the blog!